Here's one that was passed to me by another student of life:
"If you want to make friends with body-builders, a good way to not do it is:
1) Go to a supermarket;
2) Overload your left arm with pasta and pasta sauce (ensure you are carrying a bag of books with your right arm);
3) Turn quickly to your right, ensuring that the pasta sauce spills from the pile on your left arm and explodes upon hitting the floor - covering all body-builders (and there clean white shoes) in it.
An optional extra point at the end of this is:
4) Run.
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