Sign of the Times: The AFL hates its players, children

Picture seen in Coles Supermarket, advertising AFL player dolls for sale:

"Hello children"

I was unable to identify any of the players represented here, the only thing I could liken them too being slightly spooky monsters.


Really unsure what the AFL is trying to do here, apart from give children sleepless nights & annoy the players.

Thought of the Day: This Week in Cricket

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English Success

It has been a welcome week in Cricket after the lull that followed the World Cup that forced me to get my fix from Cricket Monopoly.

England unexpectedly defeated New Zealand in a Test that went for the full 5 days and proved entertainment right until the end.  Here’s hoping that advocates of 4-Day Tests pour themselves a nice cup of tea and have a seat for a while.

The game itself was a triumph, with the most runs ever scored in a Test at Lords and 125,000 spectators turning up.

From Twitter

Englands victory looked far from certain on Day 1, when they were 4/30 before Lunch and New Zealand looked like they had somewhere else to be on Day 5.  Should Australian opener Chris Rogers have been watching the game, he must have thought it a good time to work on his Dance moves, rather than practice ahead of his last Ashes series.

 

Needs a lot of practice

Englands' resurgence was led largely by its younger players; Stokes, Ali, Root and Buttler who are all getting a chance to learn and develop now that the old Management team is gone.  There is certainly a lot of upside around this squad.

Most impressive of all was Stokes, who has always displayed the very un-English trait of playing like he really, really cares.  Not very dignified, but his presence means there is more fight in the English side. 

Sceptics should remember he was the first English batsman to score a Century in the last Ashes series when he wasn’t even picked in the original squad.

This could be a unique opportunity for Australia to learn from England with the Ashes underway and pick an aggressive bowling all-rounder of their own in James Faulkner to see who can better wrest the initiative in games. Not the worst result for fans.

The greatest disappointment of the match itself would have to be the batting of New Zealands tail, which failed badly when the game was there to be saved. 

The importance of tail order batting has been well documented of late and New Zealand will need to heed these lessons and play with the same sort of all-round effort that they do in ODI cricket if they are to gain the same success in Tests.

There will always be an Administrator….

Despite success on the field, the ECB continues to battle with reality, with Deputy Chairman Giles Clarke publicly talking about the threat of a rebel cricket league.

Clarke is no stranger to stupid moments, publicly haranguing guests at a dinner who dared criticise his mistakes, but this latest claim is pretty rich for a man who picked a couple of exhibition matches against a team organised by Allen Stanford over the IPL.

"That chap in Prison Orange?  Yes, he's the man for us" - Giles Clarke (maybe)

It really is a testament to the volunteers, clubs and cricket lovers of England that they are able to keep producing and unearthing new talent under this mob. 

I suppose importing players does help.

Cricket is Bakistan

While England has been able to keep producing players & have the advantage of keeping punters interested in the game through matches being played in their own country, this has been denied to Pakistan since the attack on the Sri Lankan team in 2009.

One of the happier Cricket stories of the week was the return of International Cricket to Pakistan and the scenes of the happy crowd cheering on the game and their country.

Commentator and prior New Zealand Iain O’Brien this week tweeted about the lack of relevance around foreign players representing a country and this game went a long way to show why it is important. 

The Cricket fans, and populace in general, of Pakistan have had little to cheer on in recent times and this game not only helps welcome them back into the international fold but gives them something to be proud about. 

West Indies Tests to test depth

Australia starts their Tour of the West Indies this week, starting with a match against the West Indies Cricket Board Presidents XI.  Australia is expected to win this game comfortably and the series overall, though perhaps less easily.

Given that England have been able to blood several new players of late with success, this would be an ideal opportunity for Australia to do the same. 

It is doubtful that Australian of the Century Ryan Harris will be playing for too much longer, so a new attacking bowler will need to be found.  Thankfully, Mitchell Starc, James Pattinson and Pat Cummins are all available.

Artists impression of the Australian Selectors surrounded by young fast bowlers

Of a greater concern, or more accurately a continued concern, will be around batting depth.  Chris Rogers has announced he will be retiring this year, while Michael Clarkes back probably doesn’t have too much left in it.  The impending retirement of Brad Haddin is also a concern given the number of rescue acts he has performed in recent times.

With this in mind, it is particularly confusing that Shaun Marsh and Adam Voges are the “spare” batsmen on the tour.  Voges hardly represents the future while the only thing Marsh represents is job security for medical staff.

A drunk artists impression of Australian Selectors surrounded by Batting prospects

On the West Indies side of the ledger, it will be interesting to see if Lionel Simmons can bring the same success he had with the Irish team to a side that has made the ECB look sane of late.  Being able to bring Gayle, Simmons, Narine and Bravo back to the fold would be a great start for WI cricket and the game in general.

Top 5: Jokes from Day 1 of the England v New Zealand Test

5. What's the difference between the English team and a pile of garbage? Joe Root & Ben Stokes
4. Non-selection of Kevin Pietersen
3. What do the Lords pitch and David Bowie have in common?  They both swung early, but went straight later
2. Why did Mark Craig lose his job in PR?  Lack of Spin
1. Alastair Cook

Sign of the Times: Slow News Day

From the CA Twitter account

Thought of the Day: This Week in Cricket

“No News is Good News” is the old idiom, implying that if there is nothing to talk about, then everything must be going well.  With everything that has happened in the last week, I wonder if Andrew Strauss believes the opposite; that it is necessary to create news for things to be well.

For those who have been avoiding all news, not just cricket news (as this story broke down those barriers like Dan Christian in a changeroom after being given LBW), ex-England Captain Andrew Strauss was made Director of Cricket for the English Cricket Team and started his reign by telling Kevin “KP” Pietersen he wasn’t going to be picked for England.

This may not be shocking in itself, but KP had just scoredover 300 runs in a First Class game and had been previously told that he would get picked if he scored runs.

Given Strauss’ relationship with KP, his handling of the situation is hardly surprising, though England hardly has a list of players scoring 300+ runs in a game that they can call on.

Strauss’ nepotistic management style dominated his time as England Captain and cast a long shadow on the team after he left, as the team was unable to continue winning when one of the preferred players suffered a loss of form or retired.

It was hardly about developing a winning culture for the benefit of fans, but a comfortable culture for the benefit of himself.

I'm comfortable, how about you?

KP has indicated that this (Strauss’) approach is now being embedded at the ECB, with Strauss telling him that England were prepared tolose the Ashes this year so they can develop new players.

Now, I don’t know how familiar Strauss is with running high performance sports teams, but he would do well to look at the recent plight of the Melbourne Football Club in the Australian Football League (AFL).

The AFL has a draft system for all new players, with the worst performing clubs getting the better draft picks to help them get better in future. 

Some years ago, Melbourne took the odd step of deciding that they weren’t going to get any better by being better, so started getting worse to get better.  Get it?

Got it.

The decision by the Executive group at MFC to lose games toaccess better draft picks ruined the club to the point that the AFL had to step in to find the club a coach and CEO as the losing mentality had permeated every element of the club.

Now that Strauss has decided to go down a similar path, without the benefit of a Draft of players to pick from (England are won’t to pick other teams players already), its baffling to think what the benefit may be.

Anyone?

  

Should England start to fail further and turn more fans away from the game, will the ICC interfere?  Surely England could be demoted or penalised for deliberately being uncompetitive?  Will the ICC allocate revenues to better run countries (e.g. Ireland) to help them coax players to them and create better development pathways?

Probably not.

Regardless, the other impact that Strauss probably should be a little concerned about is book makers.  These poor fellows have their livelihoods supported by the ability to rig the outcome of cricket games, or even deliveries within games, and if England stops being competitive; whatever are they to do?

Poor bookmakers.

Whatever the reason for his decisions, Strauss is certainly making a name for himself.

Enter the Dragon

In an interesting coincidence, rumours have continued to spread about the development of a break-away cricket league featuring legends of the game. I’m always excited at the prospect of these leagues as they achieve two things most immediately:

1. Provide competition to current administrators, forcing them to improve the management of the game; and

2. Develop changes within cricket that inevitably improve it as a product

The most obvious example of this was World Series Cricket, which did impact the Australian team (in particular) for almost a decade, but also saw it become much more customer-focussed.

With all the rumblings in the ECB, a healthy alternative couldn’t come soon enough.

Thought of the Day: This Week in Cricket

Peter Obornes book, “Basil D’Oliviera: Cricket andConspiracy, the untold story”, gives a detailed look into the political and personal surrounding the career of Basil D’Oliviera, the South African-born English cricketer who (indirectly) led to South Africa being banned from Test cricket.

The book is a fascinating read and aside from the obvious racist and political outrages, gives a fascinating insight into how sporting administrators put the purpose of their role (promote sport, improve society) behind personal prejudice.

With that in mind, its time to take a look at This Week in Cricket:

All Change, All Change

Coming off a mediocre drawn Test series in the West Indies in which they were supposed to build momentum towards the Ashes, the England and Wales Cricket Board have appointed former Captain Andrew Strauss as Director of Cricket and sacked Coach Peter Moores.

The appointment of Strauss is an interesting one, given the strategic nous he has shown in commentary (e.g. referring to Englands bestbatsman as a c*nt) doesn’t really suggest he will move away from the boys-clubissues that have riddled English cricket of late.

Still, there is a lot to like about the potential of the English team, certainly the inclusion of players like Ben Stokes and Moeen Ali will provide a team that at least cares.

Ben Stokes, seen here at a family picnic

Further, the speculation is that Jason Gillespie may take over as head coach from Peter Moores, which should see the team start to enjoy itself in the way the Australian team has under man manager (not data manager), Darren Lehmann.  Is it too late to make an impact before the Ashes?  Probably.

Respect the Long White Cloud

Before the Ashes though, England has a chance to settle and build some momentum in a home series against New Zealand.  The likelihood of this, though, is slim.

New Zealand are vastly under-rated and have the talent to take 20 wickets and build 400+ scores in any conditions, anywhere in the world.  I expect New Zealand to dominate the series against England.

More to their credit, the Black Caps have achieved this without a massive population to draw cricketers from, or regular major cricketing trophies to pique interest from the crowds at home.

While Australia is supposed to play the “Chappell Hadlee” trophy every year, there was a break of 4 years between the latest contests. 

If the International Cricket Council is series about the future of the game and growing it, the Chappell Hadlee trophy should be played at least every second year, perhaps as a 3-test series in conjunction with another 3-test series with another team.

This would allow Australia to honour its commitments to India, England and South Africa by playing a 5 or 6 test series against them every other year.

Here's something I wrote on the issue a while back.

Regardless, the Black Caps are one of the most exciting teams in the world right now and deserve to be seen and challenged at the highest level.

The anxious tourists

Speaking of excitement, the Pakistan Cricket Board has announced that a Test cricket team will be touring their country for the first time since the Sri Lankan team was attacked there in 2009.

The International Cricketers Association have voiced strongconcerns over the series and advocating that it doesn’t go ahead, it’s a wonder that it has gotten up at all. 

The PCB must be thankful that Zimbabwe Cricket is so broke and value their players so poorly that they will send them anywhere for a buck.

With Pakistan proving that it is still a force in Test cricket in the last few weeks, none of these Tests should last more than 3 days, which will be a relief to the Zimbabwean players who will likely be surprised to find a place less appealing to play cricket than Zimbabwe.

Thought of the Day: This week in Cricket

Another week has past in Australia where winter is supposed to be coming, but like an annoying party guest, it arrived too early and is now making itself at home while you busily try and clean the house.

The early cold has never made cricket seem so far away and looking at matches proceeding in the West Indies and Bangladesh does little to cheer me up.  There have been a few other issues in the Cricket World this week, but they’ve been pretty well covered here, here, here, here and here.

I’m just dealing with the cold, man.

To help me deal with it, I’ve broken out the limited addition Cricket Australia Monopoly set.  

Almost as good as the real thing

This triumph of marketing follows the guidelines of the original game of Monopoly, but changes the street names to cricketers and the Chance and Community Chest cards (renamed to ‘Test’ and ‘One Day’) etc to something cricket related.

While entertaining, the game does raise a number of questions, such as:

What is Dan Cullen doing in there?

I’ve got nothing against Dan Cullen personally, but for a representation of the best Cricketers of the era that the game was made, I don’t think he is an appropriate inclusion.  

1 Test wicket? You're on there!

 

Valuing him at $100, or on par with Shaun Tait (a large part of Australia winning the 2007 World Cup) and Stuart Clark (fiercely underrated) is also bizarre.

The Avenue of Legends

Having Don Bradman and Steve Waugh as the most expensive properties (replacing Mayfair and Boardwalk) does make some sense, though The Don is the only player on the board to pre-date Australia moving changing currency to the Dollar.

Why exclude others like Warwick “The Big Ship” Armstrong, Neil Harvey, Keith “Nugget” Miller or even the late Richie Benaud?

As for Steve Waughs inclusion, that should be a no-brainer, but is his place in Australian cricket as entrenched as Don Bradman?  Surely it would make more sense to do a straight swap with Alan Border (of Alan Border Medal fame) as a Legendary Captain (which replaced the Train stations)?

Value

I touched on this earlier, but the value put on players seems to be whole heartedly out of touch with their value.

As mentioned, the asking price for Dan Cullen is $100, whereas Stuart MacGill (208 Test wickets) and Brad Hogg (17 Test wickets, 156 ODI wickets & another big part of the 2007 World Cup winning team) is a combined $120.

Michael Kasprowisz, who served Australia gallantly bowling long overs in India and/or into the wind when Glenn McGrath didn’t want to, is valued at $140 – which is parity with Jason Gillespie (199 Test Wickets and a Test double century).

Suggestions

So, how to make my cold winter weekends less consternating while playing the game?  Well, I could just talk to my family or do absolutely anything else, or I could dwell on this like someone with too much time on their hands and try to work out a solution.

The solution I have come up with is to change the streets from one era into many to create talking points and more interest, while also dividing the streets into skillsets and specialists from different forms of the game. 

And here are my suggestions:

Go: Rename to “Play”. It’s how the game starts.

Brown Streets: The most useless and annoying. Should definitely be Shaun Marsh and Xavier Doherty.

Light Blue: The streets you end up saving your $200 for passing Go for once the game is in full swing.  Can sting you early.  This should be the opening bowlers; DK Lillee, Glenn McGrath and Ray Lindwall.

Jail: Should be called The Long Room.  You spend your time in their waiting around to die after all.

Pink: A bright colour should be represented by the best of the cricketers who wear colour, the ODI representatives.  In this instance we go with Adam Gilchrist, Brett Lee and Dean Jones

Orange: One of the better value streets on the board, which can ultimately win you the game and fittingly represented by the Batsmen, being; Ricky Ponting, Steve Waugh and Alan Border

Red: These streets can really hurt you if you’ve already been punished by the batsman in the Orange streets, so these are the middle-order bats, being Ian Harvey, Doug Walters and Mike Hussey.

Yellow: The last street you hit before you enter the finishing line and often one of the costliest, this is represented by the spinners in Stuart MacGill, Bill “Tiger” O’Reilly and Nathan Lyon (he does have 138 Test wickets)

Green: These are the second most expensive

Dark Blue: The ritziest and most expensive properties on the street, these are represented by equally flash cricketers or characters in Keith Miller and Kerry Packer

Train Stations: Are a notable part of the game, so should be represented by notable characters of the game.  In this case, Warwick Armstrong, Don Bradman, Richie Benaud and Shane Warne

The Utilities: These enable the place to run, so are best represented by the Test and ODI formats

Taxes: Simply change them to Match fines.

Chance: The great risk taker, Ian Chappel

Community Chest: I was going to suggest Kerry Packer again here, but given the hit and miss nature of these cards; lets go with T20 Cricket.

Sign of the Times

Seen in Block Arcade earlier....